Each individual has a different way they want to receive love in their relationship. One partner might feel loved receiving gifts, while the other prefers cuddling. Or maybe another feels loved when their partner runs an errand for them. Still, do we know if the love we give our partners is how they want to receive it? In other words, we often show our partners love in a way we think they want to receive it, but we might not be speaking their love language.

Which Love Language Are You?

For those who haven't read The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman, this book focuses on the importance of receiving the kind of love each partner desires and how engaging in each other's love language can benefit a relationship.

1. Words of affirmation

Have you ever complimented someone only to observe them light up? It's the same for many individuals in relationships. Although, let's not mistake needing words of affirmation as insecurity but instead as the love language that makes a difference to them.

For example, a person might feel most loved when their partner tells them they're doing a good job raising their family. They may appreciate hearing how nice they look. Or maybe they just want a simple thank you for cooking their partner a meal.   

2. Quality time

Sometimes, a person needs quality time with their partner to feel their love. Just receiving their undivided attention and feeling like they're the only one who matters to them at the moment can be meaningful. 

For example, quality time can entail a dinner date and great conversation. It may be putting the kids to bed at night and spending time with each other, talking and laughing. 

3. Physical touch

Just as a newborn needs to be held and touched to feel loved, many adults need the same. However, feeling that way doesn't make them infantile. Many people require physical touch.  

For example, it can be as simple as a hug, holding hands, kissing, or sitting next to one another. 

4. Acts of service

It can be challenging if one partner pulls the weight in the relationship while the other isn't contributing. Therefore, for many individuals, nothing beats a partner pitching in to ease their stress, especially if they don't have to ask. 

For example, it could make a significant difference if their partner takes out the trash without asking them. Or it could help tremendously if their partner takes over caring for the children to give them a break.

5. Receiving gifts

Some might equate people who like receiving gifts from their partners with greed. However, it just happens to be another love language for many individuals.  

For example, suppose one partner is at work when they receive a basket of flowers from their partner. The way it affects them has nothing to do with the number of flowers or the cost, but rather the fact that their partner was thinking of them is what meant the most.  

Couples Can Benefit from Using Love Languages

Giving and receiving in a way each partner needs is beneficial in any relationship. However, for it to work, partners must communicate their needs and work together. So, why not start now?